WWE ECW 13 - 9/05/2006
WWE Network Link: http://network.wwe.com/video/v1529450983?contextType=wwe-show&contextId=wwe_ecw&contentId=238351224&watchlistAltButtonContext=series&start=0
My God! Can it be?! It is! I am back!
It's been over 2 years since the last Every WWE ECW Ever. However, quarantine is a bitch, and I figured, what better time to do another installment? Let's begin where we left off with WWE ECW 13.
First off, DX is here! What fun! Wonder what they're here for? I am sure I would have known if I didn't take a two year break.
My God! Can it be?! It is! I am back!
It's been over 2 years since the last Every WWE ECW Ever. However, quarantine is a bitch, and I figured, what better time to do another installment? Let's begin where we left off with WWE ECW 13.
First off, DX is here! What fun! Wonder what they're here for? I am sure I would have known if I didn't take a two year break.
Match #1: Sabu & Rob Van Dam vs. Test & Mike Knox (Extreme Rules)
We start off with our extreme rules match of the evening. Test and Mike Knox has the potential to be a cool tag team. Also, it's really strange wasting test when you know what happened. Can't wait for Benoit to show up to make this a real doozy.
This is also the first time RVD and Sabu have teamed up together in this new iteration of WWE ECW. That's pretty cool, but it's also a bit criminal it took 13 episodes. It's really something else that WWE grabbed all of these old wrestlers from ECW and they somehow lasted around a year or two in the company doing all of their crazy shit. It's a miracle they lasted as long as they did.
Sabu is setting up tables and chairs outside while the match goes on. Are you saying RVD is playing possum? How creative if so. RVD then takes a super weird bump off a jumping kick to the outside.So unnecessary. You wonder why these guys can barely walk these days. Also complete side note, but I love the sound of the ring in WWE ECW, at least the first 13 episodes. Every single move sounds like it's devestating. I remember this especially from the (upcoming) Big Daddy V matches. Sabu and RVD work well as a team, pulling out tandem moves left and right. Test impressively holds up Sabu after some power work but RVD kicks him RIGHT IN THE FACE. Damn. You cringe at every move, truly.
Highlight of the match is Sabu putting Test, Mike Knox, AND RVD through a table with a cross body. The table absolutely obliterates, and they stay down as the crowd goes wild. Then Sabu takes a chair throw directly to the skull when we return from break, then Test returns the favor by letting RVD kick him directly in the skull while holding a chair to his cranium. Test is cut open bad.
Sabu then puts Mike Knox into a Camel Clutch, and then puts a chair up to his face. RVD then bounces off the ropes and DROP KICKS THE CHAIR. OUCH. WOW. Sabu then pulls of a few nice moves, highlighted by a summersault off a chair onto Test, who JUST kicks out. I respect Test a lot more after this match.
The match ends with RVD and Sabu doing leg drops onto Mike Knox through a table. RVD absolutely whiffed and slammed his head. Kinda funny, but still a cool ending. This was definitely a great match, and a welcome one to return to the show to.
Winner: RVD and Sabu
Match Rating: Excellent
Weapons Used: Chair (3), Table (2)
--
Kevin Thorn promo! I think we might be getting a match from him, and if so, I am absolutely on board. Can't wait.
Match #2: Matt Striker vs. The Sandman
I am reading my old post from WWE ECW 12, and apparently I counted these kinds of segments as matches. Thus, that will continue. Striker is about to give us another lesson. Something about jocks and sports being stupid. He is absolutely an asshat and whatever comes next will be truly deserving. Striker berates the fans for what feels like an eternity until The Sandman comes out, hammered as FUCK, spitting beer everywhere. My biggest regret in my wrestling fanhood is never seeing The Sandman live.
The Sandman enters the ring, and Matt Stryker... bolts? And that's it. Segment over. I was truly upset about that, I really was. The Sandman just write "SUX" under Matt Striker's name and then Striker calls him out. Whatever. This was such a waste of time. Nothing else left to be said.
Winner: No Contest; Technically The Sandman
Match Rating: Boring
Weapons Used: None
--
It's Kevin Thorn! Him and Ariel are out at ringside and, well... okay. She gives Joey Styles a lap dance. Interesting. I'm guessing Thorn is out here for Balls.
Match #3: Stevie Richards vs. Balls Mahoney
Talk about a match to be having in 2006. These are two ECW originals, after all. Mahoney is definitely the more memorable, but Richards is probably someone I can more so respect now.
Really solid match, something you definitely would not be expecting when finding out it was these two. It is a technical match above all else; no weapons, no foul play, nothing. Just two guys grappling for position in this new landscape.
However, Balls soon decides to bring Thorn into the match. He calls them out when beating down Richards. Thorn decides he is going to get involves, but Balls fights him off. Stevie Richards replies with a DEVIOUS low blow. BOOM. Big old swing. He rolls up Balls and wins. This is an obvious set up for something more with Thorn and Balls, but for now, Stevie gets his moment.
Winner: Stevie Richards
Match Rating: Setting Up More
Weapons Used: None
--
Shannon Moore promo. Can't wait to watch him wrestle. He looks ridiculous... AND CM PUNK CALLS HIM OUT FOR IT. It's time this guy wrestles... just surprised they're going to be burying him this quickly.
Match #4: The Big Show vs. DX (Shawn Michaels & Triple H) (Extreme Rules)
Oh? Extreme rules you say? Do not mind if I do. The Big Show is currently going through his unstoppable phase, so this will surely be a doozy.
Paul Heyman comes out and announces that this will... what? This will NOT be under extreme rules? That is RIDICULOUS. I am disgusted. Appalled. I can't believe this. This is E.C.W. The fucking Extreme Championship Wrestling. Just terrible. But who knows; the match hasn't started.
This is somehow a one-sided affair for Big Show even though it's 2 on 1. The Heyman RIOT guards decide to get involved, and they are authorized to use force! They beat down poor Shawn, then headbutt HHH with riot helmets. I'll count them! DX eventually battles back, and it looks like Big Show is about to take a Pedigree, but Hardcore Holly comes out and breaks this up. DX is officially your winner by DQ. In ECW. The absolute shame.
Holly and Big Show beat down DX, and then the RIOT squad begins to choke Shawn and beat him with their police batons. HHH finds from the bottom of the ring his trusty companion; his sledgehammer! He takes care of the RIOT squad, one of whom eats a Super Kick. The Heyman goons disperse from the ring, and DX celebrates in the ring to close out the show.
Winner: DX (Shawn Michaels & HHH) by DQ
Match Rating: What Could've Been...
Weapons Used: Riot Helmets (2), Police Baton (1), Sledgehammer (1)
--
Not a bad show all in all; it starts with a red hot match between some ECW originals and the newer blood of the brand, and ends with a decent match between DX and Big Show. It just could have been so much better.
We start off with our extreme rules match of the evening. Test and Mike Knox has the potential to be a cool tag team. Also, it's really strange wasting test when you know what happened. Can't wait for Benoit to show up to make this a real doozy.
This is also the first time RVD and Sabu have teamed up together in this new iteration of WWE ECW. That's pretty cool, but it's also a bit criminal it took 13 episodes. It's really something else that WWE grabbed all of these old wrestlers from ECW and they somehow lasted around a year or two in the company doing all of their crazy shit. It's a miracle they lasted as long as they did.
Sabu is setting up tables and chairs outside while the match goes on. Are you saying RVD is playing possum? How creative if so. RVD then takes a super weird bump off a jumping kick to the outside.So unnecessary. You wonder why these guys can barely walk these days. Also complete side note, but I love the sound of the ring in WWE ECW, at least the first 13 episodes. Every single move sounds like it's devestating. I remember this especially from the (upcoming) Big Daddy V matches. Sabu and RVD work well as a team, pulling out tandem moves left and right. Test impressively holds up Sabu after some power work but RVD kicks him RIGHT IN THE FACE. Damn. You cringe at every move, truly.
Highlight of the match is Sabu putting Test, Mike Knox, AND RVD through a table with a cross body. The table absolutely obliterates, and they stay down as the crowd goes wild. Then Sabu takes a chair throw directly to the skull when we return from break, then Test returns the favor by letting RVD kick him directly in the skull while holding a chair to his cranium. Test is cut open bad.
Sabu then puts Mike Knox into a Camel Clutch, and then puts a chair up to his face. RVD then bounces off the ropes and DROP KICKS THE CHAIR. OUCH. WOW. Sabu then pulls of a few nice moves, highlighted by a summersault off a chair onto Test, who JUST kicks out. I respect Test a lot more after this match.
The match ends with RVD and Sabu doing leg drops onto Mike Knox through a table. RVD absolutely whiffed and slammed his head. Kinda funny, but still a cool ending. This was definitely a great match, and a welcome one to return to the show to.
Winner: RVD and Sabu
Match Rating: Excellent
Weapons Used: Chair (3), Table (2)
--
Kevin Thorn promo! I think we might be getting a match from him, and if so, I am absolutely on board. Can't wait.
Match #2: Matt Striker vs. The Sandman
I am reading my old post from WWE ECW 12, and apparently I counted these kinds of segments as matches. Thus, that will continue. Striker is about to give us another lesson. Something about jocks and sports being stupid. He is absolutely an asshat and whatever comes next will be truly deserving. Striker berates the fans for what feels like an eternity until The Sandman comes out, hammered as FUCK, spitting beer everywhere. My biggest regret in my wrestling fanhood is never seeing The Sandman live.
The Sandman enters the ring, and Matt Stryker... bolts? And that's it. Segment over. I was truly upset about that, I really was. The Sandman just write "SUX" under Matt Striker's name and then Striker calls him out. Whatever. This was such a waste of time. Nothing else left to be said.
Winner: No Contest; Technically The Sandman
Match Rating: Boring
Weapons Used: None
--
It's Kevin Thorn! Him and Ariel are out at ringside and, well... okay. She gives Joey Styles a lap dance. Interesting. I'm guessing Thorn is out here for Balls.
Match #3: Stevie Richards vs. Balls Mahoney
Talk about a match to be having in 2006. These are two ECW originals, after all. Mahoney is definitely the more memorable, but Richards is probably someone I can more so respect now.
Really solid match, something you definitely would not be expecting when finding out it was these two. It is a technical match above all else; no weapons, no foul play, nothing. Just two guys grappling for position in this new landscape.
However, Balls soon decides to bring Thorn into the match. He calls them out when beating down Richards. Thorn decides he is going to get involves, but Balls fights him off. Stevie Richards replies with a DEVIOUS low blow. BOOM. Big old swing. He rolls up Balls and wins. This is an obvious set up for something more with Thorn and Balls, but for now, Stevie gets his moment.
Winner: Stevie Richards
Match Rating: Setting Up More
Weapons Used: None
--
Shannon Moore promo. Can't wait to watch him wrestle. He looks ridiculous... AND CM PUNK CALLS HIM OUT FOR IT. It's time this guy wrestles... just surprised they're going to be burying him this quickly.
Match #4: The Big Show vs. DX (Shawn Michaels & Triple H) (Extreme Rules)
Oh? Extreme rules you say? Do not mind if I do. The Big Show is currently going through his unstoppable phase, so this will surely be a doozy.
Paul Heyman comes out and announces that this will... what? This will NOT be under extreme rules? That is RIDICULOUS. I am disgusted. Appalled. I can't believe this. This is E.C.W. The fucking Extreme Championship Wrestling. Just terrible. But who knows; the match hasn't started.
This is somehow a one-sided affair for Big Show even though it's 2 on 1. The Heyman RIOT guards decide to get involved, and they are authorized to use force! They beat down poor Shawn, then headbutt HHH with riot helmets. I'll count them! DX eventually battles back, and it looks like Big Show is about to take a Pedigree, but Hardcore Holly comes out and breaks this up. DX is officially your winner by DQ. In ECW. The absolute shame.
Holly and Big Show beat down DX, and then the RIOT squad begins to choke Shawn and beat him with their police batons. HHH finds from the bottom of the ring his trusty companion; his sledgehammer! He takes care of the RIOT squad, one of whom eats a Super Kick. The Heyman goons disperse from the ring, and DX celebrates in the ring to close out the show.
Winner: DX (Shawn Michaels & HHH) by DQ
Match Rating: What Could've Been...
Weapons Used: Riot Helmets (2), Police Baton (1), Sledgehammer (1)
--
Not a bad show all in all; it starts with a red hot match between some ECW originals and the newer blood of the brand, and ends with a decent match between DX and Big Show. It just could have been so much better.
Match of the Night: RVD & Sabu vs. Test & Mike Knox - My favorite match of the night by a wide margin. They went all out in this Extreme Rules match, and I'm sure it is no coincidence that any Extreme Rules match will win this award.
Wrestler of the Night: Sabu - Sabu went all out in this match and, in my opinion, looked to most crisp. Vince saw something in Sabu during this time; you can just tell. He faces Big Show the week before, gets the pin tonight, and will soon be facing John Cena. I think facing Cena is a seal of approval for any wrestler.
Worst of the Night: Matt Striker - he did nothing again tonight.
Weapon Count (Total): 9
Chair: 24
Table: 12
Table: 12
Kendo Stick: 9
Garbage Can: 5
Police Baton: 6
Garbage Can Lid: 4
Police Baton: 6
Garbage Can Lid: 4
Street Signs: 3
Camera Cord: 2
ECW Title: 2
Ladder: 1
ECW Title: 2
Ladder: 1
Baking Sheet: 1
Al Snow's Head: 1
Steel Steps: 1
Barbwire Baseball Bat: 1
Bag of Thumbtacks: 1
Announcer's Table: 1
Belt: 1
Cane: 1
Water Bottle: 1
Ring Bell: 1
Chalk Board: 1
Stapler: 1
Announcer's Table: 1
Belt: 1
Cane: 1
Water Bottle: 1
Ring Bell: 1
Chalk Board: 1
Stapler: 1
Police Helmet: 2
Sledgehammer: 1
Total (all time): 83
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